Time is Standing Still

Normally time seems to just fly by for me. Not this week. I'm sure it's because of the events surrounding my dad. And yet, it's given me time. Time to reflect, time to pray, time to go to lunch a LOT with my sister Peggy and really have some nice talks. (I missed that for much of our adult years and I'm so glad to have that gift back). Time to watch Mom sit by the bedside of her dying husband and keep busy with knitting while she shows the undying love she's had for this man for the past 50+ years. I've learned a lot these past two weeks....just by watching my mom, my dad and my incredible brother and sisters rise to the occasion, link arms and be a family. What a priceless treasure.

I've also witnessed my Mary Kay unit step up to the plate. They've linked arms and become a "family" of wonderful women. While I was unable to do a lot of my Mary Kay work these past 2 weeks, my incredible unit pulled together and reached a milestone that not many Mary Kay units ever do...I am so proud of them...they just make me look so good as their leader.

June is the end of our fiscal year in Mary Kay....usually it flies by because there is never enough time to accomplish a huge goal. It didn't really matter this June....I learned a lot this month.

My Dad

I sit at the keyboard to write and yet I don't know what to write. What was the point in putting on my makeup this morning? It's been washed away with tears. I should have known.

My Dad's not doing well. My brother and sister have posted entries about him on their blogs and they're much better at articulating the situation...so I'll just let you read about it there and see the wonderful pictures my brother has posted.

My sister Peggy and I live close to Mom and Dad so we are their support and the relayers of important information to Paul and Ruthie. It's hard to let go and yet it's even harder to stand over the bedside of the Dad you've known and loved all your life and watch him slip away. It makes you realize how fast life flies. I sat with my husband yesterday and had a conversation about how it just seems like yesterday WE were the ones consumed with getting our driver's license and what we'd be doing on our next date (that's my 15 year old and what she's going through right now). And Scott remarked that it will be that quick and our children will be having a conversation about their failing parents and what to do....oh, God....what to do.

Singer and songwriter Karen Taylor-Good says it well in her song, "Me There in the Middle" :

Dear God I've drawn this picture to make it crystal clear

I feel the need to show you why I'm praying hard down here

On the left there stand the very ones,

the ones who gave me life

The one that I gave birth to, is standing at my right

That's me there in the middle, two arms stretched out wide

Holding on for dear life, being pulled from side to side

Give me strength, help me be the rock

Give me patience, 'cause they've all become my flock

Give me courage, as they change please help me know

You'll give me the strength to hold them

And the strength.....to let them go.

I know you're watching over them, I'm not in it by myself

But it's taking all the faith I have, I need some extra help

Mom and Dad are awfully frail, and getting more confused

My 15-year-old knows it all, and hasn't got a clue

And me there in the middle, both sides leaning hard

They need all my energy, I need a stronger heart.

Give me strength, help me be the rock

Give me patience, 'cause they've all become my flock

Give me courage, as they change please help me know

You'll give me the strength to hold them

And the strength.....to let them go

Who made me the grown up?

I don't know which scares me more

Watching Dad behind the wheel

Or my child head out the door

Give me strength, help me be the rock

Give me patience, 'cause they've all become my flock

Give me courage, as they change please help me know

You'll give me the strength to hold them

And the strength....to let them go

Please continue to keep my dad and our family in your prayers.....

Off to the woods we go....

It's off to our land today....our little slice of heaven in central Wisconsin. Well, I wouldn't personally call it a slice of heaven. I would categorize it as a hunting shack with NO amenities. And, no amenities for a reason....to keep the women away!! A few acres in the paperland country....true deerhunting heaven....a retreat for my husband and son Jake. And yet, we decided that "guy/girl" thing needed to end. The family time just wasn't happening together so we recently purchased a very nice travel/trailer.....not a mobile home...but a loaded camper (I wouldn't call it camping if I was camping with one of these).

So, Scott is off with the truck, the "camper", Jake and our black lab (Joe) to the land. (That's another story I'll tell you about someday). Stefanie and I will follow shortly (we have a parade to attend). Only after we know for SURE that the camper is set up and the toilet and water are flowing.

Our land is about a mile from the second largest lake in Wisconsin (Lake Petenwell...which is really a river flowage) so we plan to go to the state park and hike and swim and just have some family time. Isn't it funny how you have to drive an hour and a half (one way) to have some "family time"? I'm sure we will, though.

Okay....you made me do it!!

Okay, okay!! My sister, Ruth Anne...who's been blogging for quite some time made me do it. Actually, after reading her entries daily I've discovered that this is a great way to record a bit of history. Someday, maybe my children will look back and probably laugh at the eccentricity of their mother.....but, then again, maybe they won't...maybe they'll just smile as they recount their history through my eyes.

So..here goes...my first entry into the blogosphere:

Where do I start? Name, dob, height, weight....well, we won't go there......Let's just say, I'm Mary from little ole Beaver Dam, WI (population 15,000..SALUTE!!) and lead a busy, happy life. I'm Mom to Stef and Jake (15 and 11) , married to Scott for almost 21 years happily and Sales Director to a large group of Mary Kay women. I'm sure my audience will be just my sisters and my brother...and that will be fine. That way they will catch a glimpse of my corner of the world.

Ruth Anne...now I can say I have finally arrived.